Some Changes...

I cannot believe how busy this semester is already and we are only a couple of weeks in.  I study almost every minute I am not sleeping, eating, or pooping.  Sorry for saying poop but it's true.  I have really had to apply myself and come up with new way to study.  Honestly, I have never had to study very much to do well...so far.  I actually bombed my first test of the semester.  In my program you need an average of 78% on all of your tests to pass the class...I got a 74%.  It's been a very humbling experience for me.  I was completely unprepared for what they were dishing out.  We shall see on Tuesday if my new "I'm-sorry-but-I-can't-(fill in the blank), I'm-studying" method works out.  I hope family and friends do not take it personally that I will be ignoring them all summer.  Hopefully it will be better come August.

On a brighter note, there has been a little change of plans.  Michael is quitting his second job!  This was a tough decision and one that came with a lot of thought and prayer.  See, we actually went to see a therapist.  My work has a free employee assistance program that offers counseling and we took advantage of it because we wanted to make sure WE were okay.  We are definitely okay, more than okay.  But, we did so some prophylaxis on our relationship.  We have been so consumed with our fertility issues that because of the lack of time we have together, it seemed like it was the only thing we have in common lately.  Let me say again, we are more than fine!  We have had no issues in our relationship that caused us to think that we might not be, but we have been warned that infertility can do a number on a married couple's relationship.  I really think we went mostly for a professional's confirmation that we are a cute, loving couple and because we really like to talk about ourselves.  Anyway, she confirmed that we are cute and loving and that yes, we like to talk about ourselves.  She did get us thinking though.  She reminded us that all of the stresses in our life are ones that we have chosen.  She suggested that we think about Michael quitting his second job.  At the time, I thought that was a terrible idea since quitting his job would just be eliminating one stress and adding another.  We still need money to do this so...

I have been thinking about this since then and Michael thinks about it all the time since his job is miserable and he doesn't have a day off.  I love his hard work and dedication to do anything to make this all possible for us. He always has a great attitude, even when he doesn't want to do something.  But, lately he has become depressed and mopey and it's been hard for him to hide his feelings about the job.  I told him a few weeks ago that I missed him because he hasn't been the same guy for a couple of months.  So...no day off, no time together, not being able to go to church, hating the actual work, and basically having no life...it got me thinking.

Up until the today I thought there was no way we would decide that quitting would be the best thing for us right now.  I have been pondering and praying about this ever since the counseling session.  As I was sitting (alone) in Sunday school, something came to me very quietly.  Money is just money.  We will always make more.  Michael needs to quit his job.  The money is not worth sacrificing the most important things in our life right now.  I felt like it's more important for him to be at church every Sunday and for us to have a little more time together.  We have been trying to focus on church, going to the temple, and what's really important.  Money is not one of those things.  I know we will be blessed for doing this.  I just really feel like this is the right thing for us to do and I didn't have to talk Michael into it.  We will continue to pray for other opportunities to make a little extra money for our IVF but either way, it's going to happen.  If we have to charge it then...CHARGE IT!  I'm really good at that.