Tag...

I've been tagged

My husband...

What is his name? Michael
How long have you been together? We re-met in January 2006
How long did you date? We got engaged April 3rd and married in November 3rd 2006:)
How old is he? 32!!! I always have to think about this one...
Who eats more? Probably me.  He is a snacker though.  I definitely eat faster!
Who said I love you first? ME!!!
Who is taller? him
Who sings better? I'm always singing but Michael has great voice, too!
Who is smarter? He always says I'm the smartest girl he knows but I think he's smarter than me.  He can figure things out that I never could. :)
Whose temper is worse? Mine. Hands down.
Who does the laundry? Especially in the last 2 years...him.  I have maybe done 4 loads over the past 24 months.  He's a keeper!
Who does the dishes? Usually me but there are times when he gets so sick of looking at them he will do them every now and then.
Who sleeps on the right side of the bed? He does but I sleep pretty dang close to him so kind both!
Who pays the bills? He does. The system he has is so smart but so complex that if he died, I would be in big trouble.  He can do a mean spreadsheet!
Who mows the lawn? HIM! I tried once to surprise him and he thought it was "cute" but told me I didn't have to do it again.
Who cooks dinner? Every once in a blue moon, me. Dinner in our house is a sad situation which I determine to turn around in 38 days!
Who drives when you are together? He does.
Who is more stubborn? Probably me.
Who is the first to admit when they are wrong? He is.
Whose parents do you see the most? His. They are a little closer than mine!

Who kissed who first? I'm going to say he kissed me but I think we both were going in for the kill!

Who asked who out? he asked me out, technically. His words were "do you not want to go home but not stay here?" (we were at his parents house) :)

Who proposed? he did
Who is more sensitive? He is, I think.
Who has more friends? If I had to choose, I would say he does.
Who has more siblings? We have the same, 3.
Who wears the pants in the family? We are on the same team so I would say we both fit into Jared of Subway's old pants together!

*I'm not sure I like how some this played out.  Baby, I promise, in 38 days I will do more laundry, cook us dinner's and try not to have such a temper.  Love you, babe!

Cyst...

Yay!  The cyst on my fallopian tube is no big deal.  He even said I have the "perfect baby hosting uterus".  Thanks, that makes me feel good but I had the "perfect uterus" last time too.  It's such a different vibe going into IVF #2.  I try to get excited and I am but I find myself with a million reservations.  I have talked to a few IVF veterans and they say it's normal to not be the bright-eyed, naive, optimist that I was during our first cycle.  I guess it's just a natural defense mechanism to be guarded.  I don't find myself talking about it as often or blogging about it or telling the whole world.  I actually feel silly talking about it.  Last time, I couldn't shut-up about how I was so sure it was going to work.  I can't say that this time and I am definitely not sure it will work.  I know very well, first hand, that it could fail even under the best of conditions. I don't want to get hurt again.  However, we are both "cautiously optimistic".  We go back in two weeks to get our calendar, order meds, and pay.  I love the hope that has flooded back into our life.  If we didn't do this because we were too scared, it definitely wouldn't work, huh?  We've got to try.

New RE #3...

Yes, another new doctor.  I don't really know what lead up to the switch exactly but I know it's a good one.  Every since our consult with Dr. Heiner, Michael had been feeling a little uneasy about everything.  He expressed that he wasn't sure about him or the clinic but didn't really know why.  I brushed him off knowing that, especially in these types of situations, if there is a flaw he will find it.  It's like buying a new house...when you are looking, you try to picture yourself living there.  Sometimes you can, sometimes you can't.  We just couldn't picture us doing our IVF there.  I chalked it up to being a weird appointment since it was so rushed because they were late and we had to get to the airport and we had just found out, in the waiting room, that Michael's grandpa had died.  DISCLAIMER*We love Dr. Heiner!  Our switch had nothing to him exactly, it was just one of those gnawing feelings that something wasn't right*

One Saturday afternoon recently I had a melt down about our finances.  It is starting to sink in that we have to pay so much money...again...for something that may be devastating...again.  We don't have the money like we did last time.  We have a little but the thought of being in debt again, after we work so hard to stay OUT, sickens me.  We were going to be paying $24,000 with RCC this time and I just wanted puke everytime I thought about it.  After the meltdown and the realization that this is what it is, I started reading some blogs.  I came across a post about an RE in Utah County that we were familiar with.   Michael had really liked him when we met him at the Utah Infertility Awareness Event in April but we already had our plans with Dr. Heiner.  I looked up the clinic, Utah Fertility Center, and showed it to Michael and we both instantly felt peace.  This is who is supposed to do it.  I made an appointment for a consultation and we had it on Thursday.  Dr. Foulk is very accomplished and we loved everything he said.  He is very passionate and confindent about what he does and he is confident that he will be able to help us achieve our end goal...a baby.

He took me right back for a baseline ultrasound and he found a teeny, tiny fibroid (he says no big deal) and a very LARGE cyst on my left tube.  He said he thinks it's the kind of cyst that does not interfere with IVF but it inhibits natural fertility because it is blocking off my tube.  It could be a type of cyst (hydrosalpinx?) that does affect IVF because it leaks fluid that kills embryos!  My tubes were never checked in my previous cycle.  He said he is almost 100% positive it's not that kind of cyst but if it was, I would have to remove my tube!  I freaked out of course because I tend do freak out about things that haven't happened yet.  I go in for another ultrasound on Thursday and we will know for sure.

Oh, another plus...it's only going to cost us around $15,000 (ha...only).  That includes two fresh cycles and two frozen cycles which means we have up to four tries to get it right!  We are very excited about that.  I was given birth control already and will get my calendar at the end of the month.  Things are moving now and it's exciting. 

I haven't been able to think about it too much which is probably good.  School is kicking my butt and it consumes my every thought.  I am also on the graduation commitee which is a blast and between that and studying and trying to see my husband every once and while...I'm spent.  Just 51 more days until it's over but who's counting?